1 2Warning: 3 The fortunes contained in the fortune database have been collected 4 haphazardly from a cacophony of sources, in number so huge it 5 boggles the mind. It is impossible to do any meaningful quality 6 control on attributions, or lack thereof, or exactness of the quote. 7 Since this database is not used for profit, and since entire works 8 are not published, it falls under fair use, as we understand it. 9 However, if any half-assed idiot decides to make a profit off of 10 this, they will need to double check it all, and nobody not involved 11 of such an effort makes any warranty that anything in the database 12 bears any relation to the real world of literature, law, or other 13 bizzarrity. 14 15==> GENERAL INFORMATION 16 By default, fortune retrieves its fortune files from the directory 17/usr/share/games/fortune. A fortune file has two parts: the source file 18(which contains the fortunes themselves) and the data file which describes 19the fortunes. The data file always has the same name as the fortune file 20with the string ".dat" concatenated, i.e. "fortunes" is the standard fortune 21database, and "fortunes.dat" is the data file which describes it. See 22strfile(8) for more information on creating the data files. 23 Fortunes are split into potentially offensive and not potentially 24offensive parts. The offensive version of a file has the same name as the 25non-offensive version with "-o" concatenated, i.e. "fortunes" is the standard 26fortune database, and "fortunes-o" is the standard offensive database. The 27fortune program automatically assumes that any file with a name ending in 28"-o" is potentially offensive, and should therefore only be displayed if 29explicitly requested, either with the -o option or by specifying a file name 30on the command line. 31 Potentially offensive fortune files should NEVER be maintained in 32clear text on the system. They are rotated (see caesar(6)) 13 positions. 33To create a new, potentially offensive database, use caesar to rotate it, 34and then create its data file with the -x option to strfile(8). The fortune 35program automatically decrypts the text when it prints entries from such 36databases. 37 Anything which would not make it onto network prime time programming 38(or which would only be broadcast if some discredited kind of guy said it) 39MUST be in the potentially offensive database. Fortunes containing any 40explicit language (see George Carlin's recent updated list) MUST be in the 41potentially offensive database. Political and religious opinions are often 42sequestered in the potentially offensive section as well. Anything which 43assumes as a world view blatantly racist, misogynist (sexist), or homophobic 44ideas should not be in either, since they are not really funny unless *you* 45are racist, misogynist, or homophobic. 46 The point of this is that people should have a reasonable 47expectation that, should they just run "fortune", they will not be offended. 48We know that some people take offense at anything, but normal people do have 49opinions, too, and have a right not to have their sensibilities offended by 50a program which is supposed to be entertaining. People who run "fortune 51-o" or "fortune -a" are saying, in effect, that they are willing to have 52their sensibilities tweaked. However, they should not have their personal 53worth seriously (i.e., not in jest) assaulted. Jokes which depend for their 54humor on racist, misogynist, or homophobic stereotypes *do* seriously 55assault individual personal worth, and in a general entertainment medium 56we should be able to get by without it. 57 58==> FORMATTING 59 This file describes the format for fortunes in the database. This 60is done in detail to make it easier to keep track of things. Any rule given 61here may be broken to make a better joke. 62 63[All examples are indented by one tab stop -- KCRCA] 64 65Numbers should be given in parentheses, e.g., 66 67 (1) Everything depends. 68 (2) Nothing is always. 69 (3) Everything is sometimes. 70 71Attributions are two tab stops, followed by two hyphens, followed by a 72space, followed by the attribution, and are *not* preceded by blank 73lines. Book, journal, movie, and all other titles are in quotes, e.g., 74 75 $100 invested at 7% interest for 100 years will become $100,000, at 76 which time it will be worth absolutely nothing. 77 -- Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love" 78 79Attributions which do not fit on one (72 char) line should be continued 80on a line which lines up below the first text of the attribution, e.g., 81 82 -- A very long attribution which might not fit on one 83 line, "Ken Arnold's Stupid Sayings" 84 85Single paragraph fortunes are in left justified (non-indented) paragraphs 86unless they fall into another category listed below (see example above). 87Longer fortunes should also be in left justified paragraphs, but if this 88makes it too long, try indented paragraphs, with indentations of either one 89tab stop or 5 chars. Indentations of less than 5 are too hard to read. 90 91Laws have the title left justified and capitalized, followed by a colon, 92with all the text of the law itself indented one tab stop, initially 93capitalized, e.g., 94 95 A Law of Computer Programming: 96 Make it possible for programmers to write in English and 97 you will find the programmers cannot write in English. 98 99Limericks are indented as follows, all lines capitalized: 100 101 A computer, to print out a fact, 102 Will divide, multiply, and subtract. 103 But this output can be 104 No more than debris, 105 If the input was short of exact. 106 107Accents precede the letter they are over, e.g., "`^He" for e with a grave 108accent. Underlining is done on a word-by-word basis, with the underlines 109preceding the word, e.g., "__^H^Hhi ____^H^H^H^Hthere". 110 111No fortune should run beyond 72 characters on a single line without good 112justification (er, no pun intended). And no right margin justification, 113either. Sorry. For BSD people, there is a program called "fmt" which can 114make this kind of formatting easier. 115 116Definitions are given with the word or phrase left justified, followed by 117the part of speech (if appropriate) and a colon. The definition starts 118indented by one tab stop, with subsequent lines left justified, e.g., 119 120 Afternoon, n.: 121 That part of the day we spend worrying about how we wasted 122 the morning. 123 124Quotes are sometimes put around statements which are funnier or make more 125sense if they are understood as being spoken, rather than written, 126communication, e.g., 127 128 "All my friends and I are crazy. That's the only thing that 129 keeps us sane." 130 131Ellipses are always surrounded by spaces, except when next to punctuation, 132and are three dots long. 133 134 "... all the modern inconveniences ..." 135 -- Mark Twain 136 137Human initials always have spaces after the periods, e.g, "P. T. Barnum", 138not "P.T. Barnum". However, "P.T.A.", not "P. T. A.". 139 140All fortunes should be attributed, but if and only if they are original with 141somebody. Many people have said things that are folk sayings (i.e., are 142common among the folk (i.e., us common slobs)). There is nothing wrong with 143this, of course, but such statements should not be attributed to individuals 144who did not invent them. 145 146Horoscopes should have the sign indented by one tab stop, followed by the 147dates of the sign, with the text left justified below it, e.g., 148 149 AQUARIUS (Jan 20 - Feb 18) 150 You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You 151 lie a great deal. On the other hand, you are inclined to be 152 careless and impractical, causing you to make the same mistakes over 153 and over again. People think you are stupid. 154 155Single quotes should not be used except as quotes within quotes. Not even 156single quotes masquerading as double quotes are to be used, e.g., don't say 157``hi there'' or `hi there' or 'hi there', but "hi there". However, you 158*can* say "I said, `hi there'". 159 160A long poem or song can be ordered as follows in order to make it fit on a 161screen (fortunes should be 19 lines or less if at all possible) (numbers 162here are stanza numbers): 163 164 11111111111111111111 165 11111111111111111111 166 11111111111111111111 22222222222222222222 167 11111111111111111111 22222222222222222222 168 22222222222222222222 169 33333333333333333333 22222222222222222222 170 33333333333333333333 171 33333333333333333333 44444444444444444444 172 33333333333333333333 44444444444444444444 173 44444444444444444444 174 44444444444444444444 175 176 177